


Uncouth, Barbaric, and Perfect for Me

by NessieFromSpace



Category: Borderlands (Video Games)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Borderlands Gift Exchange 2020, Ex Lovers, F/F, Those auctions where you can pay to date someone, charity auction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-24
Updated: 2020-12-24
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:00:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,455
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28291278
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NessieFromSpace/pseuds/NessieFromSpace
Summary: Aurelia is set to be the date of an old geezer for the charity auction... Until her ex, Nisha swoops in and buys it out. Now, Aurelia is stuck with an ex lover she would rather not be around at all.
Relationships: Aurelia Hammerlock/Nisha
Kudos: 2





	1. Part One

**Author's Note:**

  * For [catlikeacat](https://archiveofourown.org/users/catlikeacat/gifts).



> This was my gift for the Borderlands gift exchange this year! I hope you like it!

She had donated many things to the charity, but the best thing she had done was enter herself in the auction. Aurelia Hammerlock was sexy as hell and she knew with all the gross rich men, she’d bring the charity heaps of money.

She chose a silver and gold bodycon dress with a cowl neckline that dipped low in the front and lower in the back. She wore her hair up with expensive earrings that dangled the length of her neck. She made her way around the crowds of unattached, old men, laughing at their dirty jokes and petting their upper arms. She knew she had all of them eating out of the palm of her hand. She grinned wider knowing she was going to beat out the others in the auction.

“Wow, laying it on thick, aren’t ya?”

Aurelia knew that voice anywhere. She’d had a brief affair with that voice. She glared at Nisha, who had never made enough money in her life to afford to be at the charity. “What are _you_ doing here?”

Nisha sipped her champagne. “Just checking this shin-dig out.” Her eyes took Aurelia in fully. “It’s getting much better now.”

Snorting, Aurelia took Nisha’s drink from her. “I don’t know how you got in, but you definitely didn’t pay the entrance fee. I don’t know why you’re here, but you’re not going to get it. I’ll make sure of it. This is a dignified place.”

Grinning wide, Nisha took Aurelia’s hand that held her glass of champagne and tipped it so Nisha could drain it. Before she could pull her hand away, Nisha kissed it.

Aurelia gasped and yanked away. “You are a degenerate!” She turned away from Nisha and slipped into a group of men who would undoubtedly bid for her affections.

* * *

Nisha had forgotten how much she’d adored Aurelia. The woman was so much fun to mess with. To ruffle those beautiful feathers. She looked incredible and even more so when she was angry. She smiled at the woman’s back, framed in that gorgeous dress.

And, if she’d read the stupid pamphlet right, Aurelia was set for the auction. She grinned wider and moved to the man who would make _things happen_. “Irving! My man!” She wrapped her arm around his shoulders.

He stiffened, face turning red. “What the hell are you doing here?” he hissed.

She laughed. “You are going to win Aurelia Hammerlock at the auction.”

“Are you crazy!? _My wife is here!”_

“Should have thought of that before…” Her voice trailed off to indicate a shared secret. When Irving puffed redder, she rolled her eyes. “Obviously, you aren’t going to _have her_. _I_ want her. I’m sure you can think of a clever excuse to tell the missus, you’ve had years of practice.”

“Fine! You wretched woman!”

“You’re a champ!”

* * *

Aurelia refreshed herself before joining the lineup. She was pleased to find the choices were very good this year. Everyone was gorgeous. And, with the ridiculously high buy in, she did not have to worry about Nisha trying to buy her.

Smiling wide, she walked onto the stage. Immediately, bids rolled in. Higher and higher they went, topping all that had gone before her. She knew half were so they could talk business with her and that was alright, she could go a day listening to nobodies droning on about whatever insignificant business they thought was important.

The final bid was five digits. Aurelia grinned triumphantly and sauntered off stage to go meet the lucky geezer.

What she saw made her blood run cold and then boil. He stood there, signing papers with Nisha standing next to him.

“Just _what_ is the meaning of this?”

The man at least had the decency to look ashamed. “I, uh, bid on her behalf. I apologize for the confusion or any trouble that will be caused. Have a good night.”

Aurelia glared at Nisha. “You manipulative-”

Nisha laughed. “Oh, get over yourself. Meet me at Rodger’s tomorrow at ten. Dress to get messy and be active.”

A cold chill ran through her. “What childish games are you going to force me to do!?”

“It doesn’t matter, since you have to do them or forfeit the donation.”

Anger seethed inside her. “I am going to make you regret this!” She stormed off, ripping her heels off so she could move quickly.

She did not sleep well. Nisha was one of the only people who could infuriate her immediately. Ever since she’d made that mistake two years ago. And now she had to spend the whole day with her. 

She was at least glad she didn’t have to dress up. She only needed to apply a light foundation, eyeliner and mascara with a touch of lipstick. Her hair was pulled into a perfect ponytail and found a button down shirt she hardly wore that she could toss after the day. Some form fitting jeans and designer tennis shoes pulled her look together.

She got a coffee from her favorite shop and got to Roger’s just at ten. Nisha was there, having what looked like her second coffee. Aurelia sat down in the ripped vinyl booth, scrunching her nose at having to touch the table that only resembled wood.

“We _really_ had to meet up here? Couldn’t we have met in someplace nicer, like a dumpster?”

“Good morning to you, too. Here’s a menu.”

“You want me to touch _that?_ ”

“Well, I’m not going to hold it for you.” Nisha was smirking, reveling in Aurelia’s misery.

Gingerly, Aurelia pulled the menu to her and used one manicured nail to flip the pages. She scanned the menu, her nose scrunching the more she looked at it. “Well, I supposed the only thing of any sort of worth is possibly this Eggs Benedict.”

“You _do_ know it will be on store bought English muffins, right?”

She huffed loudly and scooted the menu to Nisha. “I don’t understand what sort of perverse pleasure you get out of dragging me through the mud. Did you make that man pay to spend the day with me just to humiliate and mock me?”

Nisha laughed, drinking her coffee. “Of course not. I wanted to spend the day with you. It’s been too long since we were together.”

“So, this is about sex?”

Shrugging, Nisha sat back. “Maybe. Or maybe I wasn’t finished last time.”

“Not finished? We spent _days_ having sex, how can you not be finished?”

Laughing loudly, Nisha leaned forward to say something, but was stopped by the waitress. “I’ll get your Lumberjack special and she’ll have your Eggs Benedict and a side of bacon.”

Aurelia scoffed, but said nothing. When the waitress had gone, she eyed Nisha. “Will you at least tell me what the schedule for today is?”

Nisha laughed. “And ruin the surprises? Or give you a chance to complain about them? Nah, you’re just going to have to deal with not knowing.”

“You are so barbaric.”

“And you’re a spoiled brat. You let all that money make you into nothing more than a prissy baby.”

“Rather a prissy baby than a Neanderthal!”

“But you _loved_ when I was a Neanderthal.”

“A slip in resolve I’ll never do again.”

Grunting, Nisha drained her coffee. “We’ll see.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My tumblr: http://nessiefromspace.tumblr.com/  
> My Borderlands/ fanart tumblr: https://nessiesspeakeasy.tumblr.com/  
> My old Borderlands tumblr: http://nessiefromink.tumblr.com/


	2. Part Two

Aurelia felt disgusting after the meal. It had been too greasy and she was loathe to admit that the bacon she’d refused at first had been the best she’d ever had. She climbed into Nisha’s truck that was way past its prime and buckled up. It had no air conditioning, so they had to roll the windows down.

“Absolutely not!” Aurelia gasped. “And ruin my hair!?”

Rolling her eyes, Nisha leaned across the truck at a red light. She turned the crank handle that rolled the window down. A nice breeze blew into the truck and Aurelia hated it.

“Relax, princess, it won’t matter if your hair gets messed up today.”

She glared. “I _knew_ you were going to make me do something awful!”

They pulled into a recreation center and Aurelia groaned loudly. “And just _what_ are we going to do here?”

Grinning wide, Nisha unbuckled Aurelia. “Some friendly competition.” She got out and went around to Aurelia, who hadn’t moved. She opened the door and grabbed Aurelia’s hand. “Let’s go, princess!” She yanked Aurelia out.

“I’m not a ragdoll!” She pulled her hand away. “What could possibly be here that you think will justify _me_ being here?”

“I told you, friendly competition. Whoever gets to the top first, gets to top tonight.”

Aurelia blinked. “You think we’re going to have sex tonight? That’s cute.”

“You can’t resist me. That’s a fact we both know. You throw all those insults, but you can’t wait for me to get my hands on you.”

Aurelia eyed her, but said nothing.

A toothy grin spread across Nisha’s lips. “So, whoever gets to the top today gets to top.”

They entered the center and Nisha led them to the large area where a rock wall had been built.

“We’re going to _climb?”_ Aurelia stared in disbelief. She hadn’t done anything that physical in years.

“Don’t worry, you’ll be on the beginner’s setting.”

Frowning, she shook her head. “I don’t think so! We’re going to be on the same level so when I kick your ass, I’ve earned it.”

“I’m pretty advanced.”

“Fine with me!” Aurelia walked ahead of Nisha and demanded everything that Nisha was going to get.

Nisha asked for only the needed protection if they fell. “We’ll do a short wall.”

“Medium.”

“Alright,” Nisha laughed. She began to help Aurelia strap in. Aurelia was silent as Nisha moved around her. The woman smirked. “You miss me being this close, hmm?

Grunting, Aurelia rolled her eyes. “I think the better question is what’s taking you so long?”

Nisha wrapped her arms unnecessarily around Aurelia to strapped her into her harness. She smiled when Aurelia galred. “Just admiring you.” She stepped away. “You’re all ready.” She was quick to get herself strapped up.

They began the climb. It was not easy in the least and Aurelia took too long in the beginning for her liking. It was a process getting the rhythm and Nisha was leagues ahead of her. By the time she got to the top, she’d cut the space between them, but Nish still won. She held her hand out to her.

“I gotta say that was damn impressive! For your first time wall climbing that was better than anyone I’ve seen!”

Aurelia was tired, so she let Nisha pull her up. “I was rubbish, but I do say! That was invigorating!” She sat on the edge, looking down the distance she’d climbed. She smiled. “For being an uncouth form of exercise, it wasn’t half bad.”

“Glad you think so, wanna do it again?”

“You’re on!”

* * *

Aurelia was sore, but it was enriching and massaged her soul. She stretched in the truck. “What other ghastly thing are you going to make me do?”

Nisha smirked. “This one is to see who picks dinner.”

“Well, it is going to be me. I _will not_ be subjected to anymore greasy food!”

“Tch, not likely.”

Aurelia glared. “You’re very cocky for only winning once.”

“It’s one more than you’ve won.”

“I’m going to change that.”

When they stepped out into the parking lot of an arcade, she quirked a brow.

Nisha grinned wide. “They’ve got the best laser tag arena.”

 _“Laser tag?”_ How much more childish can you get?”

“Yeah, I didn’t think you’d want to play paintball.”

Aurelia scrunched her nose up further at that.

“Thought so. C’mon, winner picks dinner.”

She felt utterly ridiculous strapped into the clunky plating, but at least Nisha did as well. They were on separate teams. Aurelia was confident that hers would win and she’d make sure of it.

Halfway through and they were smoking Nisha’s team. Aurelia commanded the high schoolers and college kids and they were leading a victory. They hid when they needed to and maneuvered perfectly. They only had three more people to get at this point. Aurelia found, to her great joy, Nisha, crouched and unaware Aurelia was behind her.

Quietly, she crept closer until she was inches away. The impending victory filled her mind and when Nisha turned around to see who had shot her, Aurelia pulled her into a kiss. Their lips met hard and victorious. Nisha moaned and grabbed the back of her head, trapping Aurelia against her.

She leaned into Nisha, remembering just how wonderful the woman’s kisses were. That had been why Aurelia had lowered her standards so much the first time. Nisha had kissed her so perfectly. She had lost all self respect and had allowed the woman to take her to bed multiple times. Kissing Nisha was like tasting the most wonderful guilty pleasure Aurelia had ever had. So delicious, she pressed her tongue into Nisha’s mouth, wanting more and more.

There was a loud bell and then the lights turned on. Aurelia pulled away, startled from the high of winning.

“Uh…” She stood and walked away from her, cheering with her team. “I knew we would all be awesome!”

“Yeah, yeah,” Nisha said, strolling out from where she’d been hiding. She smirked at Aurelia. “Looks like you won, baby.”

Frowning, Aurelia grunted. “Yes, well, of course I did!” She turned away from Nisha, not wanting to see the smug look. She’d had a small bout of weakness, that was all, it wouldn’t happen again.

And she said as much when they slid into the truck.

“What kiss?” Nisha asked, grinning wide.

Aurelia glared at her. “You know exactly what I’m talking about.”

The woman hummed. “No, I don’t recall.”

Huffing, Aurelia threw her hands up. “Why do you insist on being so irritating?”

Laughter from Nisha got closer as she scooted across the truck to invade Aurelia’s space. “You ain’t a ray of sunshine yourself, ya know? You haven’t been nice to me once in all the time we’ve known each other.”

Aurelia leaned away, frowning. “I never asked for you to be anywhere near me!”

“But you _did_ kiss me.”

She froze. “I… Well…” She fumbled. “I… I thought you didn’t remember that?”

Nisha leaned over her, body touching, eyes roaming over Aurelia’s body. “Oh, I could never forget it. It’s the first time you initiated something between us. I knew you liked me.”

“I… It… It was a misjudgment in the thick of excitement! It meant nothing!”

Grunting, Nisha’s hand wrapped around Aurelia’s wrist, her thumb rubbing the underside. “You know what I think? I think you like me a lot, but you’re too afraid to accept it.”

 _“Afraid!?”_ Aurelia glared. Her heart was weirdly racing and it was hard to focus on anything other than that thumb against her skin. “I’m not afraid of anything! I’m Aurelia Hammerlock!”

Nisha laughed. “You’re so full of yourself. If you weren’t afraid, you wouldn’t care what everyone else said if you dated me.” Nisha leaned in, lips grazing her neck.

Aurelia’s eyes fluttered shut, ready and wanting that touch.

Nisha whispered, her breath warm. “But you’re a coward, so you let what others think tell you how to be.” She slid back to her side. “Too afraid and prideful to have fun,” Nisha sighed, shaking her head.

She started the car.

It took longer for Aurelia to move and buckle herself in. She was furious. “I’m not a coward,” she fumed. “I don’t like you because you’re barbaric. If you were more refined and respectable as preferred, then, we wouldn’t have problems!”

Nisha laughed. _“Do you even hear yourself when you talk?_ You just confirmed what I said! ‘Refined and respectable as preferred.’ As who prefers? You prefer? Is that what you prefer?”

Aurelia blinked. “Preferred… Like…” She could not come up with the rest of that sentence. Who _had_ she been talking about? And what _did_ she prefer?

They pulled up in front of a cafe. It was one Aurelia frequented, which meant friends and acquaintances would be there. At least one person would see them together. Well, that couldn’t be helped.

She got out of the car, to her credit, without hesitation. They found a seat and Aruelia ordered her usual. “So, what is our next stop?”

Nisha, smirked. “Archery. Ever shoot an arrow before?”

“Certainly not!”

“Well, you will today.”

Huffing, she crossed her arms. Movement behind Nisha caught her attention. Nell waved at her and then mimed powdering her nose. Sighing, Aurelia stood. “I’m going to the bathroom.”

“Don’t sneak out on me,” Nisha smirked. “Though, I’d love to chase you down.”

Rolling her eyes, Aurelia walked away from her. She went into the bathroom where Nell stood with a couple other girls that came to Wednesday Brunch. “Oh my, Aurelia! _That’s_ who won you at the auction!? Are you okay? I heard she’s dangerous!”

“I heard she forces herself on women!” another said.

“I heard she’s gotten women to give her all their money! Do you need us to get you out of this?” asked the third.

Aurelia frowned. “Where _on Earth_ did you hear all of this?”

“Oliver! He said Nisha cornered him and groped him and forced herself on him!”

“That’s right! And she tried to say he came onto her! Like she’s even his type!”

“We can sneak you out! We’ll make up for the money lost! It’s not worth her safety!”

Aurelia blinked. She had no idea what they were talking about. She knew Nisha better than any of them and knew she was nothing like what they were saying she was.

“Honestly,” Nell said. “She’s too barbaric for you to be forced to spend the day with!”

Those words snapped her attention back to the group. “Barbaric,” she murmured. “That answers that, then, doesn’t it?” she sighed. She rolled her shoulders back and looked at the girls. “I am very disappointed in all of you. I’m very disappointed in myself as well! Oliver is a downright twat who never grew out of his fratboy years. If you believe him, you’re just as idiotic as a broom! Have you ever had a conversation with Nisha? I know you haven’t because you can easily accuse her of all that dribble.” She pulled her lipstick out of her purse and reapplied it.

The women gasped and blustered, their voices rising and echoing off the walls.

“How dare you! We’ve been nothing but supportive!”

“How can you side with _her!?”_

Aurelia tucked her lipstick back in her purse and looked at them. “You _are not_ on my side! You’re too stupid to understand what _my side_ is! And as for her barbarianism,” she smiled wide at them. “She’s only a barbarian in the bedroom and let me tell you, she’s better than any man you all will _ever_ be with! She made me scream so loud in ecstasy, the neighbors complained!”

That cut through them deeper than anything else she could have said. She left them there, speechless and thoroughly affronted, with her shoulders rolled back and head held high.


	3. Part Three

She sat down across from Nisha in her chair. “I’ve been an utter fool,” she said. “I apologize for my behavior. It was uncalled for and you did nothing to deserve it.”

Nisha blinked at her. “What the hell happened in that bathroom?”

The three women came out then and Aurelia glanced at them. Nisha turned in that direction. “Ah, you had a girls meeting.”

“And it was an complete mistake. Or perhaps I needed to hear it. _They’d prefer_ to side with Oliver in that _you_ molested _him_. Ha!” She snorted, glaring at them as they huddled in their table, leaning close together and whispering. “I never believe anything that oaf says! I am severely disgusted by how blindly I’ve followed them.”

Nisha smirked. “They were that bad, huh? I don’t remember this Oliver.”

“Good,” she snapped. “He’s not worth remembering!”

Nisha’s eyes widened, her grin turning crooked in amazement.

“Well! Enough of them! They’re not worth our breath.” She reached forward and took Nisha’s hand.

Her brow quirked. “But you’ll hold my hand to piss them off?”

“Of course, darling!” she said loudly so that it carried over to them. Quieter now, she gave a soft smile. “I need to make up for my inappropriate attitude towards you. Though, I do still think every activity we’ve done today has been uncivilized.”

At that, Nisha laughed loudly. “Of course you have! You wouldn’t be you otherwise.” She pulled Aurelia’s hand to her lips. “I’m glad you’ve come around to me, though.” She kissed it slowly, her eyes focused on Aurelia.

“Well, I haven’t _actually_ come around to you, now have I?” She grinned wide.

“I can change that. We can stir up trouble in the bathroom. C’mon, princess, let’s get you nice and filthy and start some rumors.”

It was the first time Aurelia had ever giggled. It caught both of them off guard. Aurelia covered her mouth. “Well, that does sound exciting! I’ve never been rebellious like you, but… I must say! It is rather addicting!”

“And you’ve only just started.”

Their food came, but before they could set it down, Aurelia stopped them. “I’m actually going to be sitting there.” She moved to the seat kitty-corner to Nisha. She smiled. “That’s better!”

Nisha’s eyes flicked past Aurelia. “Oh, that made them really mad.”

“Put your hand on my thigh.”

The spark in Nisha’s eyes ignited. She leaned forward and rested her hand on Aurelia’s thigh. “I forgot how hot you are when you take charge like this.” Her hand rubbed over the jeans, dipping deep into her thighs and returning.

She smiled. “Mmm, but that does feel rather good!”

“Course it does, I’m amazing.”

“Mmmm, you are… I suppose you’re still going to continue on with the day you planned instead of ditching to go somewhere more private?”

“You’re not getting off that easily.” She winked and leaned back to her seat to start eating.

* * *

They were laughing when they got into the truck. They had started kissing as they’d waited for the waiter and had made the group of women leave in disgust and cause a scene. Aurelia had quirked a brow and had made Nell clarify what they had been doing. When she had been too flustered to say it, Nell had turned red in the face and screamed, storming out.

“I have only seen her that angry at her wedding,” Aurelia sat back in her seat. “Oh, that was way too fun, I think.”

“You’re not getting cold feet on me, are ya?” Nisha turned the ignition over.

“You still have me until midnight.”

“And then?”

The question hung in the air. The last time they’d been together, Aurelia had snuck out so as not to allude that it had been more than just a one night stand. She’d been cold and uncaring then and though she’d very much changed her opinion towards Nisha, she didn’t know what she would do.

The car ride was silent and they did not talk until they got to the archery range.

“So, you’re an expert at archery?” Aurelia asked.

“Nah, but I’m pretty good.”

“You always were good with your hands.”

Nisha smirked.

The set up looked complicated and intimidating, but by the time she was about to ‘loose’ her first arrow, Nisha was standing very close and leading her through the steps. She liked how Nisha felt against her. She found herself leaning into the woman, her toned body against her own soft and pampered one.

“You’re not focusing.”

“Sorry, darling.” She stood straight and made ready. When she was certain she would at least be able shoot the arrow further than her feet, she let go. It soared a few feet before pitifully winding into the ground.

“Not bad.”

“Alright, let me see you shoot one.”

Nisha was a natural, she hit the bullseye at least half the time. Her short sleeves allowed Aurelia to watch those muscles work. The same ones that had held her against the wall, pinning her so she could only quake against the woman’s hand.

“Well, I must say I like watching you.”

Nisha grinned. “I like you watching me.” She readied another arrow, this time the muscles flexing more dramatically than before.

 _“Ooh!”_ Aurelia sighed, leaning back into the bench. She let her fingers drag lightly over her chest. “I will admit I have not forgotten those.”

“Good. I planned to use them tonight.”

“Excellent.”

They forgot for a moment where they were, only focusing on each other. Nisha smiled wide. “I think I changed my mind. We should get take out.”

Aurelia smirked. “Took you long enough.”

* * *

They could barely keep away from each other as they ordered from Aurelia’s favorite restaurant that did take out. They barely set the food on Nisha’s table before colliding together. Their breath mingled, hands groping to get out of clothes.

Nisha pushed Aurelia, naked, against the wall. “Remember this? I’ve been dying to do this to you all day.” Her hand lowered between Aurelia’s legs, grinning at how ready she was.

“I’ve been dying for you to do that to me since the auction.”

“Of course you have.”

* * *

They ate their dinner in Nisha’s bed, legs tangled together. The television played in the background, ignored as Nisha draped some of her food over Aurelia’s body.

“That’s disgusting,” she said.

“You have to shower anyway.”

“You’re disgusting.” She did not move away though, watching how intent Nisha was to lick the pasta off her side. She pulled Nisha into a hard kiss.

Aurelia lay awake. It was two in the morning, the time she would have snuck off already, and yet…

She had no desire to do so. She stared at Nisha, spread out across the bed, limbs overlapping Aurelia’s. She was wild and practically uncivilized and a thousand leagues better than anyone who was. She was even better than herself at times. She sighed heavily. She always left a lover’s home. She had never allowed herself to get tied down in the messiness of a relationship, but now… Now she found herself wanting to know what would happen if she stayed through the morning.

So she did. And she awoke to hot lips between her legs. “Oh, if I had known this is what was waiting, I would have stayed last-” her words were cut off as Nisha pressed in harder.

Aurelia arched her back. “Alright, I wouldn’t have.”

Nisha pulled away, kissing up her body. “I’m glad you stayed.” Her head broke through the covers. She smiled.

The smile Aurelia gave was the softest Nisha had ever seen it. “I am too.”

**Author's Note:**

> My tumblr: http://nessiefromspace.tumblr.com/  
> My Borderlands/ fanart tumblr: https://nessiesspeakeasy.tumblr.com/  
> My old Borderlands tumblr: http://nessiefromink.tumblr.com/


End file.
